The Gang Gets Reported | Ep 79 (Audio Only)

Welcome back to the only show where “Can you guys shut the fuck up?” is both a catchphrase and a customer service policy.
Last week Jenn yelled at her dogs and some weirdo in New York reported the video like it was a war crime. Somehow that spirals into arguments about sharing deodorant, stealing food off someone’s plate, toothbrush boundaries, fart strategy, and whether watching a show without your partner is basically cheating.
Then the show goes exactly where it should: midget hooker interviews, a cartoonized “shut the f*ck up,” a kid beating the hell out of his abusive dad, and a travel influencer teaching people how to turn a hotel coffee maker into an underwear laundromat from hell.
Ian rolls in with a karaoke capsule machine and enough weird junk to start a museum for divorced mall nerds.
By the end somebody gets folded in a wrestling ring, somebody gets cracked with a bottle over ranch dressing, and Jenn once again proves her internet comment section is a crime scene.
Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸
🧠 EPISODE BREAKDOWN
• Mikey kicks off the show yelling “shut the f*ck up,” leading into Jenn getting reported on Facebook after yelling at her dogs in a video strangers decided was “unprofessional.”
• Stroke talks about his birthday at a pizza/karaoke bar where a spring breaker hits on Christina and one of the girls, triggering stories about waiters flirting with underage teens in front of their parents.
• Buffet chaos follows: Golden Corral war stories, Shoney’s serving alcohol at breakfast, post-radio-show drinking, and the “sunrise rule” where if the sun comes up the hookup dies.
• The crew debates relationship hygiene: sharing deodorant, stealing fries, ChapStick rules, refusing to share toothbrushes, and the hard line at ball-hair razors.
• Bathroom boundaries explode with open-door pooping, “poop closets,” locking the bathroom while home alone, and whether mouth hugs are cancelled if you pooped that morning.
• Manscaping horror stories include itchy regrowth, naked mole rat balls, and finding abandoned pubes on public toilets and the old radio station bathroom.
• Listener voicemails bring up Jesse the Celtics fan from Citrus Heights, South Sac’s legendary midget hooker, Jenn’s “shut the f*ck up” soundboard becoming a ringtone, chemtrail paranoia, and dreams of another NTDS barbecue or festival.
• WTF News covers sushi push pops in Japan, the Gen Z insult “choppelganger,” a 13-year-old beating up his abusive dad, and a travel influencer washing underwear in a hotel coffee maker.
• Digital Dumpster Fire features a brutal wrestling fail, a ranch-dressing fight ending with a bottle to the face, a kid getting yanked into a car by his pants, and one deeply cursed creepy-guy video.
👕 MERCH
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📩 CONFESSIONS
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🎥 VIDEO VERSION
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