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in this uncensored episode 2N’s gone for the day, nobody’s fired (probably), and we’re knee-deep in updates about the hooker giveaway poll, the censorship “experiment,” and why some of you freeloaders suddenly hate beeps. We break down the logic behind editing last week’s episode, talk through monetizing without turning into the morning zoo, debate White Chicks 2 like adults who never matured, and casually discuss branding cows while wondering why we don’t have sponsors. Also, yes …. someone’s winning steak money for Steak and a Blowjob Day. Listen for the details to win in this episode and go to our our facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/NotThatDamnShow) Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 If you’re gonna represent, represent correctly. 🧢 https://www.nottds.com/store/ Got secrets? We like those. Drop it here before you explode: 🫣 https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow If you listen every week and still haven’t followed… that’s weird. Fix it: 🎧 https://linktr.ee…

The Gang debates giving away a legal Nevada hooker as a prize. Not a joke. Not a bit. An actual poll gets created. They read one-star Bunny Ranch reviews from men mad they only got 15 minutes after negotiating the price down. They argue about whether you can legally shoot a guy jerking off outside your window. (Spoiler: you can’t.) A lawyer jumps in to break down: • Aiding and abetting • Defamation vs opinion • Miranda rights • When you actually have to identify yourself It’s prostitution economics, legal education, and public indecency rage — all in one episode. Welcome to America's Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 Buy merch that’ll get you banned from Disneyland 🧢 https://www.nottds.com/store/ 💌 Confess Something weird Drop your anonymous confessions. We read everything. 🫣 https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow Like, Follow, Subscribe, Rate, Review and Comment on EVERY DAMN PLATFORM. 🎧 https://linktr.ee/nottds Want the full video episode? Join the DPs on Patreon for exclusive con…

A psychic bails. Stroke almost books a flight to Arizona for a $200,000 reward. We legally clarify that we are not responsible for anyone choking during the Steak & BJ giveaway. A tapeworm diet story makes everyone reconsider the dark web. China flexes humanoid kung-fu robots. A dad tracks his 15-year-old to a house party and gets accused of “violating privacy.” Harvard body parts are being sold for profit.  And somehow we end up researching how many midgets are in the United States.  Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 👕 Wear Something That’ll Get You JudgedShirt of the Month is live until it’s not.🧢 https://www.nottds.com/store/ 💌 Say It AnonymouslyConfess it. We’ll read it. Probably laugh.🫣 https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow Follow it. Subscribe to it. Rate it. Comment on it.Every platform. Don’t half-ass it. 🎧 https://linktr.ee/nottds Full uncensored video episode, bonus segments, voicemails, extra chaos.Join the DPs.🎥 https://www.patreon.com/NOTThat…

Welcome back to another mind-blowing episode of Not That Damn Show, where someone submits a confession asking for a Fleshlight molded from Ian’s anatomy, they explain how ugly guys somehow land beautiful wives, and Florida Man tries to avoid arrest by identifying himself as George Costanza.  Somewhere in the middle of all that, the show spirals into Craigslust gangbang ads, failed radio journalism at a dumpy motel, cupcake assaults, and the realization that facial recognition has officially killed everyone’s chances of getting away with anything ever again.  Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 Buy merch that’ll get you disinvited from family gatherings permanently: 🧢 ⁠https://www.nottds.com/store/⁠ 💌 Confess Something Fucked Up Tell us your secrets. We’re already traumatized anyway: 🫣 ⁠https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow⁠ Follow the show everywhere or continue making terrible life decisions alone: 🎧 ⁠https://linktr.ee/nottds⁠ Like, Follow, Subscribe, Rate, Review,…

Ian is “dead.” Or kidnapped. Or at a pegging convention. So naturally we call the KKK to ask how they keep their sheets so white, call the Black Panthers because Stroke found out he’s 1% black, and then pivot into Steak & Blowjob Day marketing strategy.  Meanwhile, Michael Jordan is trending for touching a kid at the Daytona 500, scientists are tracking farts with Smart Underwear, Viagra might save your heart, and a Swiss church installed hologram AI Jesus for confessions.  Also: sex toy parties, cooter festivals, frozen tortoises, and the worst Valentine’s Day movie ever made.  Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast  🇺🇸 👕 Wear Something That doesn’t suck Get your hands on official NOT That Damn Show gear before Reddit writes another essay about it. 🧢 https://www.nottds.com/store/ 💌 Got Something You Probably Shouldn’t Admit Publicly? Send it anyway. We’ll read it. We’ll judge you just a little. 🫣 https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow Hit Follow. Hit Subscribe…

It’s 9PM somewhere. Mikey’s drinking. Jen’s computer sucks. Ian might be wanted for kidnapping someone’s grandma. Frozen iguanas are falling out of trees in Florida, Pornhub comments are more philosophical than therapy, and somehow we end up discussing whether the government should monitor your masturbation habits. Add in substitute teachers showing up drunk, Uber roofie stories, mugshot guessing games, and a brief detour into actual real-life trauma that hits harder than expected. Then we go right back to midget wrestling and deadly weapon charges.  Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 👕 Buy the Shirt Before It’s Gone The “True Love Doesn’t Knock” Shirt of the Month is live. Limited run. No reprints. 🧢 ⁠ (https://www.nottds.com/store/) https://www.nottds.com/store/⁠ 💌 Confess Your Sins Anonymous. Messy. Questionable life decisions encouraged. 🫣 ⁠https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow⁠ Follow, subscribe, rate, review, comment, yell at us — whatever you gotta do. 🎧 ⁠https://linktr…

A listener wrote a song about Stroke having sex 38 times in one day and sent it in. You listened to it. All of it. That should’ve been the whole episode — but somehow, it spiraled into a half-serious campaign to let Chick-fil-A run the country, a debate over Pornhub ass-eating stats, and a book called How to Start a Cult. Next thing you know, everyone’s pitching Kool-Aid merch and Stroke is leading a sex orgy interview team in a hazmat suit. Also: funeral desecration in Florida, a Dollar Tree crime ring in Sacramento, a missing flamingo statue in Parma, a bank heist where the money was stored in a goddamn cooler, and Daniel the black guy (probably). Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 Listener Kenobi wants advice on asking a girl to be his Valentine. The gang tries to help, then mocks him with rejection trauma stories and redhead slander. A Pornhub stat claiming 73% of Gen Z eats ass gets treated like it's peer-reviewed science. Ian doubts it. Mikey blames memes. Jenn consid…

Jenn’s Only Hater crawled out of Spotify comments again… so we wrote him a theme song, roasted his existence, and then moved on like adults … by reading filthy romance novels to each other out loud. Butt stuff, “intimate muscles,” and finger placement breakdowns included.  Jenn returns from her emo sex cruise refreshed and railed, Stroke’s bones are cracking like popcorn, Ian’s heartburn gets blamed on some extremely questionable oral history and Mikey can’t sleep without hugging a body pillow now. Meanwhile, a grandma becomes a $4K-a-month escort, a methhead steals a plane, and some lunatic in the UK legally marries her dog. This episode should come with a health warning.  Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 👕 Wear This and Lose FriendsThis month’s shirt says “True Love Doesn’t Knock” — just like your ex, the feds, or that rash that came back. Limited run. Gone February 29th.🧢 ⁠https://www.nottds.com/store/⁠ 💌 Got Issues? Make 'Em OursSay something anonymous, twis…

Jenn disappears and the show immediately loses adult supervision. What starts as random facts mutates into a live Google spiral about animal anatomy that nobody consented to. Florida shows up doing Florida things, confessions cross lines they definitely saw coming, and Rick the lawyer is forced to answer questions no law school prepared him for. Somewhere in the middle, the internet hands the gang an “award-winning” country singer whose comment section becomes the real performance. Nothing gets resolved. Several things get worse. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 👕 Grab Our Shit Limited-run shirts and other bad ideas you can wear in public: 🧢 https://www.nottds.com/store/ 💌 Confess Something Fucked Up Say it here. Say it anonymously. Live with it forever: 🫣 https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow Hit follow. Lock in the subscription. Stars and comments help more than you think. 🎧 https://linktr.ee/nottds Watch the video by subscribing on Spotify. Patreon is where the extra se…

Jenn’s still gone and within minutes the show derails into emo sex cruises, hypothetical dildo merch, Craigslist freak mapping, and a brand-new life lesson that pulling your pants down is sometimes the fastest way to end a confrontation.  Add in bleach-laced spaghetti, karaoke bans over ten dollars, stolen landmark flags, Walmart reality glitches, Arnie States joins the show to calmly explains how radio lawyers killed creativity while also pitching stand-up comedy about things no lawyer would ever approve.  This episode wanders, spirals, overshares, and somehow still lands on abandoned mattress calendars and dick-shaped light switches.  Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 Get tickets to see Arnie at The Boardwalk HERE (https://app.opendate.io/e/an-evening-with-arnie-states-live-may-23-2026-657326) 👕 Shirt of the Month One shirt. One month. Then it’s gone and you’re stuck buying the leftovers like a loser. 🧢 https://www.nottds.com/store/ 💌 Confess Something You’d N…

Stroke exposes his balls (again), Ian lays out all the lies your parents fed you, and Mikey declares war on fake work marriages. Also, we investigate the science of dick elasticity, the revenge potential of a Wendy’s cup, and why everyone on the internet needs to be tased. Jenn’s out on a cruise, but the testosterone is flowing, along with violent sex confessions, sad vape dads, and another Florida Man baptism in dumbassery. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast. • Stroke shares a traumatizing hotel room incident involving the “mouse on the trampoline” technique and a very unlucky housekeeper.. • Ian drops 10 childhood lies that were complete horseshit, from gum myths to the bullshit about the Great Wall of China being visible from space. • Florida Man does donuts at a Jehovah’s Witness church on a first date. Because Florida. • Mikey blows up the concept of “work wives” and goes full scorched earth on del…

Stroke’s married, Ian’s bitter, and Mikey’s rethinking friendship contracts. Jenn’s out getting one of her Ns removed (finally), so the boys spiral into poop-launching massage parlor arrests, Craigslust, and getting real about just how damn old they’ve become. Also: Copper thieves cripple Sacramento transit, nobody wants Ian at their wedding, and Reno is full of freaks. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast. • Jenn’s missing in action due to a mysterious medical “N removal,” and the gang immediately spirals without female supervision. • A Defuniak Springs massage parlor owner weaponizes her poop to avoid arrest (actual Florida police report quote: “defecating toward the officer”). • Sacramento’s Gold Line was shut down by a copper-stealing crackhead who probably netted $50 and a Subway sandwich. • Haters still obsessed with the show — and Stroke drops the truth about white-label turkey brine and fake “rad…

Why did we stop putting babies in cages outside apartment windows? That was peak American innovation. 🇺🇸 Also…. no, don’t shake your baby 👶 Full episode is up. Link in bio or go to NotTDS.com. More inappropriate parenting tips and terrible advice await. #NTDS #NotThatDamnShow #parentinghumor #darkcomedy #wrongbutfunny

You ever find yourself inventing vagina breath strips and betting on poultry to shit on a number while judging prison inmates for murder and theft? No? Then you’re not living right. In this episode, we do all of that and way too much more. By the time the felon dating game hits, it’s already too late to back out. One woman’s in for burglary. Another for homicide. And we all still picked her. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 👕 Grab Our Shit Perfect for bingo, jail visits, or disappointing your dad: 🧢 https://www.nottds.com/store/ 💌 Confess Something Fucked Up You’ve done worse than us. Prove it: 🫣 https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow Rate, review, subscribe, like, follow, or go touch grass. 🎧 https://linktr.ee/nottds Want to see our faces while we shame each other publicly?🎥 Full video + exclusive extras at: https://www.patreon.com/NOTThatDamnShow Chicken Shit Bingo prison dating game vag t…

This episode is like an emotional handjob that ends with someone shoving a shampoo bottle up their ass. We start with everybody feeling feelings — like real, ugly cry-type shit — and just when you think we might be growing as people, we immediately go full brain rot. Grave-robbing psychopaths? Check. Cops turning into frogs? Yep. Federal butthole report? Hell yes. Then it’s open season on hate comments, the bitter trolls finally get their time to shine while we drag their sad little Reddit fingers through the dirt. And we wrap it up with “Who Had the Worst Week” – Dammit Edition, where one listener spirals so hard we almost call a hotline. It’s sincere. It’s disturbing. It’s aggressively dumb. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast. 👕 Grab Our Shit Buy merch that’ll get you kicked out of family events: 🧢 https://www.nottds.com/store/ 💌 Confess Something Fucked Up Send us your anonymous confessions. We won’t judge (much): 🫣 https://ngl.link/notthatdamnshow Like, Follow, Subsc…

The confessions came in hot — one about Christmas car sex with an ex, one about getting “moist” from our lawyer's voice, and a truly tragic Bingo-related grievance. That set the tone. Then it spiraled into Yelp vengeance, a full Chicken Shit Bingo tangent, and one of the dumbest games we’ve ever played: AI Fart or Real Fart?. Things were said. Lives were changed. Farrell’s Ice Cream may never recover. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast. • Listener says Lawyer Rick’s voice made them “moist.” No one recovers. • Farrell’s Ice Cream is possibly dead because of a Yelp review from one of us. No regrets. • Bingo comes up. Not normal bingo. Chicken shit bingo. • Confession of ex-wife car sex on Christmas Day — bonus: she’s remarried. • Another listener blew out two women in one night at Ms. Newby’s and wanted us to know. • Grandma’s still fucking the man who brings her…

The show’s back and somehow dumber than ever.  Stroke got engaged, then immediately waxed his asshole. The Celebrity Death Pool is back with wild card picks and 10 times more disrespect. From California gun rulings and Bangkok coffin resurrections to shamans stating the obvious, prison drone surf-and-turf and STD-sounding dinosaurs — nothing in this episode lands clean, and that’s exactly how we like it. Add voicemails, Reddit hate, dog-related bedroom trauma, and the quiet realization that everyone on this show is probably already flagged by multiple federal agencies.  Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast. 🧠 Episode Breakdown • Season Two officially launches with the Dirt Squirrel mascot discussion and a debate about never changing the intro song • Stroke announces his engagement while also explaining a same-week butthole wax, manicure, and Santa costume logistics • The return of Celebrity Death Picks includes point scor…

It’s the final episode of the year and the show immediately spirals into Christmas outfits, Black Santa politics, Florida crimes, expired eggnog confessions, and a shocking amount of vagina-based drug transport. The gang reflects on 59 episodes of accidental success, revisits the dumbest and best moments of the year, and somehow ends up defending a man who eats raw hog meat on a sidewalk. There’s gratitude, there’s filth, there’s Florida, and there’s absolutely no plan. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 🧠 Episode Breakdown • Ian unveils a full “Top 10 Best Things NTDS Did This Year” list, including Black Santa Month, Dirt Squirrel, Stroke’s songs, and the NTDS party • A Florida woman hides anti-anxiety pills in her vagina during a DUI arrest, launching the “pussy pills” and “pussy smuggler” discussion • Confessions include role-playing as someone’s mother during sex, a mysterious 20-inch “weiner,” and someone shitting their pants from expired eggnog • Rick and the…

It’s the second-to-last episode of the year and nothing is festive except the murder songs. The gang spirals from Christmas movie arguments into porn logic, listener comments, cousin ethics, and a fan-submitted song literally titled “Cousin Fucker.” A Christmas rewrite of Goodbye Earl turns into a full slasher musical, WTF News delivers dead celebrities, sex offenders, and international orgy arrests, and Mikey explains why the holidays are the greatest excuse to not give a shit. Somewhere in the middle, people fight at Walmart, someone refuses a liver transplant, and everyone agrees Andy Dick should’ve stayed dead. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast 🇺🇸 🧠 Episode Breakdown • Ian gets called out for leaving A Christmas Story off his Christmas movie list, triggering a full argument about what even qualifies as a Christmas movie • Listener comments derail into discussions about sex ed childbirth videos shown to middle schoolers • …

Confessions hit a new low. Or high. Depends how you feel about cousin-throatf*cking, blowjob-based food psychics, and judging your self-worth by your dog’s penis. Ian drops a top 10 Christmas movie list that isn’t as terrible as every other list he’s given us. Mikey shares a full Trans-Siberian Orchestra-style Strokeified Christmas song called “Christmas With The Dammits”. Jenn makes us guess if elves are getting boned. And somewhere in the background, Stroke’s kid falls down the stairs mid-show. Happy Holidays, degenerates. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast. 🧠 Episode Breakdown Stuffed Peas and Pizza Piss Rants  Rear Naked Choke at Home Depot  Confessions Include: Doggy dick envy, mailbox robbery, cousin rimjobs, and a literal blowjob food psychic. Ding-Dong Ditch Assault  Jen’s “Smut or What” goes full Christmas porn  Ian’s Christmas Movie List starts chill... and then he puts Batman Returns on it. Someone tries to murder their grandma, the gun jams, and now they live togeth…

A professional phone sex operator joins the show and immediately traumatizes everyone with stories of locked dicks, cum bottles, humiliation kinks, and clients who pay extra just to cry. Stroke’s daughter questions the Black Santa takeover, Ian gets hustled with counterfeit silver, and everyone tests out the phrase "ovary walls" on their partners with disturbingly horny results. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast. 🧠 Episode Breakdown • Stroke brings a new Black Santa to the collection and gets culturally reclassified. • Mikey retells a school nativity play gone full James Earl Jones. • Ian accepts a karaoke bribe in the form of fake silver and exacts brutal revenge. • The gang texts their partners “ovary walls” and chaos (and back blowouts) ensue. • Listener voicemails include math pickup lines and a kid yelling “African American!” at the Boardwalk • A listener's girlfriend wants to swing, and nobody wants to be the ugly half. • “Misheard Lyrics” becomes th…

Black Santa has officially taken over the show, Stroke has turned his ancestry results into a full-blown lifestyle. The the crew calls 1-900 sex hotlines on-air, and Craigslist brings us Fairbanks, Alaska’s horniest citizens alive.  Florida Man destroys a Cybertruck, someone’s pussy weaponizes itself at a concert, a trio gets busted mid-noon delight at Winn-Dixie, and confessions escalate from “Ian isn’t cute” to “I nut on faces for emotional regulation.”  Lawyer Rick shows up immediately after placenta talk because this show has no god. Welcome to America’s Loudest Podcast. 🧠 Episode Breakdown • Mikey melts down because he cannot physically begin the show without saying “Episode 55.” • Stroke unveils a full catalog of Black Santas from CVS and his house now looks like Beyoncé's multiverse. • Ian gets double-charged at a restaurant by what Stroke calls “that damn cracker,” prompting late-night drunken bank-checking. • Jen mourns the loss of her stripper lights…