The Gang Skips Stroke’s Wedding | Ep 64

0:01 Yo, turn it up. Crank the volume to 10. Guess what's for the crew who won't bow again? The hosts are united, ready to go. They tried to kill it, but we're not that damn show. Fucking we're back louder than you'll know. Corporate radio can kiss our ass. They fired us, tried to make us fall, but we're not that damn show. Still wrong. Uncut in gold. Fuck you. Fuck you all right. Welcome to America's loudest podcast. We are not that damn show.

0:43 We are all not here today. It is just me and and well, none of us are really all technically here mentally, but I'm talking about physically on the show it Jen 2 N is not with us today. She's having a procedure to have one of her ends removed, and she'll only be one end, Jen. Todd, finally. That second one was driving me crazy. I was like, what, are you going to remove that? It looks it's yeah. I can't stop staring at it. You're going by the name 2 N, which is. Turn. Actually, I just found it funny, yeah. And if you're watching the show, which you should be, we appreciate your support. You can see that it also looks a little different too. It's kind of a different little line up the way we have things on the screen. By the way, this is something I just, and I don't even think I told you guys this.

1:28 I mentioned it to Ian right before the show. But if you do, if you are somebody who enjoys the show on Spotify, we have made it and I got just going to piss the Patreon members off. I don't care. We've made it. We made the video available on Spotify. If you're already a Patreon member, you're good. Don't worry about it. You're still getting the exclusive content and the extra stuff, which is what's most important. But if you if you go over to Spotify and you subscribe, it's a it's 399 a month, but you're just, you get the video. That's all. You don't, you don't even get like, 'cause there was like 20 minutes of just stuff me and Mikey were talking about waiting on a stroke that we just leave in. So there's like behind the scenes stuff and you know, Mikey does his rants every once in a while. I got to get back to doing my food reviews. So yeah, that'll, that'll exclusively be on Patreon. But yeah, you just, and there might be things like every once in a while we're like, this is all going exclusively on the Patreon and then we'll cut to the next thing. So and yeah, so you, you, you don't get those on Spotify? No.

2:27 So, so if you want to watch the show and Spotify is your thing, I know a lot of people do go on Spotify. I can we can see the numbers and and people do enjoy it. So if you're looking and it's really easy for you, we wanted to make it the easiest way possible for people to to really support the show and watch the video as well. You don't have to. You can still listen to it. It's still available on all the other platforms. But if you want to for 399 a month, you can get the video of every episode that we do. So we do and we do appreciate that. I like that too because if if I'm watching my TV and I'll listen to Spotify and I, I go back and I kind of listen to ourselves, it's cool to watch the video to it. So I think it's put right there on the big screen if you want to in your home. We do and we do a lot of cool stuff with video and plus, you know, our fucking facial expression, some of the, some of the shit that happens, like it's just hilarious and you're missing out on some of the just some of the jokes that are happening. We, you know, we post videos and pictures with a lot of the stories.

3:12 So you know, it's a really great way to support the show and keep this whole thing going. On top of that, there is a, we do have A at shirt that is available right now that is in the store that needs to go to nottds.com pick it up. It is our monthly T-shirt. This T-shirt will be gone at the end of the month. We already are working on a Valentine's Day, sort of a February version of a new shirt. So we'll do this every month. We'll have those monthly T-shirts. It'll be hilarious. Yeah. And Full disclosure, today is Martin Luther King Day and I am working. I did not want to be here today because it is my day to celebrate my 1% and my people. But there was a parade down the street and I didn't get a chance to go because I have to be right here for this podcast. So I love you. Dude, I am so sorry Stroke. I didn't even think about that in your heritage. I apologize.

3:55 We can get into the show right now. There was that that just reminded me of something back when Stroke and I worked together here in Panama City. We had a a black Co host and for some reason it was Martin Luther King Day and we all decided after our morning show let's go down to like this park where they were having a big Martin Luther King Day celebration where it was me and Stroke, the two whitest people on earth at the time. Stroke didn't know he was black yet. Our black Co host and our and our Mexican afternoon guy. Well, I didn't know we were going to do that. When I got to work. We decided that either during or after the show I came to work. Long black trench coat.

4:38 You idiot. He looks like the white kid that shoots the school of the people were questioning it looked. Like a school shooter in the middle of like I was, I was like this. Where's Waldo in a sea of black people. And you, you can definitely tell that that guy probably shoots schools. I don't, I don't. But at the time I looked like it. It was the best food too. I'm telling you what my black people know how to cook. Oh my God, yeah dude. I I guarantee I could find that photo somewhere that we took at the at the celebration. Do you remember when you guys, when you guys lived here in California, there was we were like on the hunt for like the best barbecue and added a final. Yeah. And it was it was an African American guy.

5:18 He had the best I I. He was from southern Georgia, I remember. He's from Georgia. That's right. Let this sound stereotypical racist, whatever the fuck you want. I would say like. The best barbecue. They absolutely do. And he knew what he was doing. He had good sweet tea, too. I remember that. I mean, I don't even like. Yeah. Real sweet tea. He told me he got up at like 4:30 or five and would smoke and prepare the meat like way before the restaurant opened. It was so good. Yeah, I don't. Know if that guy's still open, actually. I don't I would very much like to know if he was because like that, that's that would be worth a trip to California on its own. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, we can come on out of here. And and we actually this weekend of you trip to California. There's some things we're working on here for Damn.

5:59 It's I want you guys to to hear hear us in the next couple of months. There's going to be some announcements of some things that not that damn show was working on and a few other things that we're working on behind the scenes where we're going to have some events and we're going to invite you guys and want you to enjoy to join us. So just keep paying attention and make sure you're following us along on social media and you're and you're, you know, paying attention to what we're doing so that you could be a part of it. And we are doing a lot of things. But the one person who did the most this past week? Or maybe it was 2 weeks. No, it was. It was like 5 days ago at this point 5. Days ago stroke you got fucking. What did I do? You got fucking very give shit right there.

6:39 What do you mean what did I do? That's actually a really cute picture of you, of you and your. Wife. I don't know how to get it off the screen. I just know how to put it up. What did I do? So right here it says we eloped Mr. Mrs. Mastro on 1/15/2026. Yeah, we did upset some folks, but it was not intentionally to hurt anybody. It got to the point where there were so many people telling you, Mikey, I don't know if you've experienced this in your wedding, but so many people were making suggestions and do this and do this. And it just got overwhelming that we just decided let's knock it out. So we found this great company that I'd met back in September our where I work still at a radio station. They do a women's Expo, which they had me there for some reason.

7:27 But we met the we met these people that do that like on the beach. And then she reached out to them. They're like, we can do it Thursday and they're like, OK. We can do it Thursday, we're in. Yeah. So we just did it Thursday. It was just, but it was, it was, it went, it was, it was perfect because it didn't have any. There was there was, there wasn't nobody going where's my seat? What do I do? Where's the food? What you know what I mean? Like you get people that just get involved so much that it just becomes stressful on everybody else. Let. Me tell you I'm mad? Yeah. Same. I'm pissed off, OK? I'm sorry. I was looking forward to going to your wedding. Yeah, so was I guess.

8:08 What you don't have to now I was looking forward to. Even better, I was looking. Forward to being in it, because if I wasn't going to be in it, then don't invite me at all because I've only known you for like 16 years. So. So who was there? No to watch. Nobody, it was just the IT was the officiant. It was the lady that took pictures and then us 2 and then people were in the condo watches from the beast cheering. I'm like, whoa, they're looking to go. Well, they didn't know they were going, but they got to watch it and so they. I'm surprised. Like you've heard from me. I've said my piece. I'm pissed off. What did Danny have to say? Because Danny was just here and you waited till he was gone. Everybody, everybody. You can see and hear the disappointment when you had to make those personal phone calls. You know, my sister and her family and you could hear it in their voices.

8:57 There was. Yeah. Everybody's a little disappointed, but I keep telling the same thing. At least you don't have to be drugged to a fucking wedding. For you I would have. For you I would have done it. I would have been dragged. I would have been dragged to a wedding. Free alcohol, free food. I will tell you the the biggest challenge I think is going to be that we cannot really physically live together till September. We have leases, we're in two different cities. We're going to move in between. You didn't. Think about that. No, I thought about it. She was the one that like, let's get married, let's do it. So I have a wife part time. That actually sounds perfect. You can do that. She probably doesn't think of it as that way, I think.

9:37 That's that's a beautiful thing. What's? So. Sorry, so, but I got to ask you, you upset some, some people probably upset. Well, how's your daughter feel about it? Like family My. Daughter was the coolest one and she goes, my daughter's kind of like a Stoner. She's like, OK. Cool. Nice, yeah. Her daughters were like, but they knew it was coming. They just didn't know it was coming then. And then yeah, I I think maybe we upset like I think her, I think when he comes down to her parents, they may have been a little upset because they wanted to be there. I can understand that. But sure, it was not meant to be that way. It was just happened. I got peer pressured into marriage. So it's not your fault. It's her fault. She fought, yeah. I blame it, I told her. I'm blaming her on your families. All on you.

10:20 Yeah, it. Was marriage rape? But it was a great day. I mean, it wasn't cold. Yes, it was a little cold on the beach, but we got married on the beach and that was our beach that we love to go to put that. Picture back up on the screen and you got to fix the thing. But I mean, that doesn't look cold. It looks beautiful. That's a really. You know no better. It was like 40°. That's what I say. That's because they were embracing the warmth of their love. Wow, 40° is beautiful you. Got your job, I got mine. Yeah, how you do? That I don't know what you're doing or whatever well good well hey the. Button that's you see the button that's highlighted right now that that's, that's what I'm doing. If you can't see, having him down there below the two of us on the screen is just nuts. So now I get the bitch whenever your bitch is about their wife. Like damn bitch, that damn wife part time part time wife to September I'm.

11:10 Also going to bitch about your wife but I'll let you go first. She's your. She's your wife. So when when September rolls around, is she going to move to you or are you going to move? In the middle. In the middle because. Her, yeah, her, her daughters are going to be like seniors. So she's going, we're going to, there's, I live in Okaloosa County. There's a county between Walton. So we're going to live in Walton County, which is just on the other side of where Ian lives in Bay County. So it's going to be right there at the probably a 45 minute drive each way. Well, you'll be it'll be a lot easier to go see you because hit strokes. This is going to this is this. Sorry, I almost said girlfriend or fiance strokes wife, so get used to that. Stroke's wife messages me on Saturday. I'm not going to say piss drunk, but she was mimosa drunk because they were still celebrating the nuptials apparently. And she's like you got me and my girlfriend. So you, you and Corey need to come out here and celebrate with us.

12:06 And it took everything in my power not to respond. Bitch, you didn't even invite me to your wedding, why the fuck would I do that? I know it got invited I. Know, but still, I'm supposed to be like on a different level. Like apparently I can't even be thought of like hey, we're getting married today. No, I find out a couple days afterwards. Look, nobody wants you at their wedding. No. Apparently my one of my best friends in the entire world got married like 3 or 4 years ago. I didn't find out till I was at the bar. I'm sitting at the bar on a bar stool with a buddy and I get a message that says, hey, Ashley and I are getting married today. We're having the reception at the bar. I'm like, you mean the bar?

12:47 I'm already at, you motherfucker. So you're telling me that you're getting married in about And he's like, well, I'm only inviting, you know, like my mom, my sister, her mom, her brother. I'm like, so apparently family ends with blood cool. I've only been your best friend for 20 years. Fuck off. Now I did find out my sister was married after like 3 weeks. Really. Wait when? Yeah, she got like, no, I mean, she's not married now, but she was married. And I guess that, I guess that my, one of my aunts went over there and just, you know, notary or something. But it was like my mom's just casually saying, you know, your sister got married like like 3 or 4 weeks ago. I'm like what?

13:29 Oh, that's awesome. Thanks for including me in things in the Yeah. Well, you got to do the same thing to her, but and I but I did say, but before we move on, I did say that I was not at Stroke's first wedding. I was not at his second one. And what happened to those two? Now, do I want him and Christina to break up because I wasn't there? Absolutely not. I'm just still a little bitter about that because I said that the third time would be. I did say the third time would be the charm, but I also had to fucking be there. You didn't. That wasn't one of the rules. You didn't say you had to be there. That was. The second one. I don't remember you ever saying that. I did say the third time would be the charm.

14:09 You did say that. Yeah. Christine's really locked down. We're not going to be buried now. She's like, we know we're buried together, right? So if if, if something happens next to each other, same hole and you get remarried like and you're like 90, you have to be buried next to me. OK, You're. Not going to live tonight. That far, So we guess we're going to have a plot. Just bitch at me blah blah blah blah blah. Forever for eternity. That's why women do those things. Is that this for eternity? They can just be in your ear about whatever the fuck. I wish Jen was here to just correct us. Yeah, there is no two this this episode could get a little weird without having a lady on the show to let's.

14:50 See what happens, It's been a while since it's just been the three of us. Like this might get disgusting. But when stroke told us, he sent us a message, he texted us and said, oh God, I have, I have I have some news or I have something to tell you guys. He. He he didn't just come out and say it. He gilded the Lily for a little bit and he's like, yeah, I have got an announcement to make and what did you and I say immediately, you're not pregnant, are you it? Sounds like you coming out of the closet or you're not pregnant. I was pregnant. Men get pregnant. I know that's a debate in America right now, but Ben cannot get pregnant. Well, we. Know that but I was like you got pregnant didn't you? God damn it. That's y'all are not ready for this. I'm not ready for this. I'm not babysitting. But then, but then we found out that you you got married.

15:32 Then all of a sudden Ian just complaints about how he's never he does. Nobody wants him at anybody's wedding. Nobody wants me at their wedding. Another friend of your guys that you guys were mentioning that got married and Ian wasn't invited to it. Oh yeah, one of our old Co hosts. He's getting married and either Saint Augustine or Jacksonville or something. He keeps moving it. Yeah, he keeps moving it. And we're in a group chat of all the old people that we used to work with another guy to get invited either. And I'm just like, OK, why are we not going? Well, because there's there was already too many people on the guest list. Like yeah, fuck you. I was going to get out of it because they had to move the date, but I was like, damn, it's the same date.

16:13 I really can't. It's closer to home, not so much, that's what. I'm saying it's it's only close to about like 45 minutes. It's still like 6 hour drive. I had a song that I wanted to play about nobody wanting Ian at their wedding and. I'm not sure. I don't know. One does. Huh. Like. Nobody does like I I I We both agreed. Yeah, OK, well, nobody does want you at the wedding. And we'll just play the song and and see if this is the right song. If it's I haven't made it. I made like 10 songs for you. I just want you to know that. Wow, why are you so obsessed with me? Because they weren't coming out, you know, this weren't coming out the way I want them to come out. They weren't hitting the mark the way it needed to hit.

16:53 So we'll see if this is the correct one. This is nobody wants Ian at their wedding. He rolls in late, no gift in hand. OK, cracks of Joe. No one understands. He's two shots deep before the stair won't even begin. He hijacks the room just to make it about him. He's not even drunk yet, it's just who he nailed it.

17:38 Nobody wants see an happy wedding. He'll kill the moon. No point in pretending. He'll Heckle your vows, chain smoke by your cake. He'll sing karaoke like it's his big break. He shows up loud and talks through the speech, hits on the bride through his teeth. He's a headache and sandals a ceremony curse. And somehow he always makes everything worse. Nobody wants seeing at their. Wedding you. Get me? You really do. That's the song. There's another there. This really is actually not the correct version, but. Oh, I think I was like, wow, like you. It was.

18:25 It was, it was hitting all the, it was hitting all the all the details perfectly. I thought that was the one because you just let it play. Well the the lyrics were were right, but there was the other one had a little bit of a a better beat to it. I like. I like it when Reba sings about me. Reba did a great job on that one. We'll put that up on the Patreon so you guys can hear the full song. If you're a Patreon supporter, you get. All the ones and let them decide which one they like, because you said there were more versions. If you're a Patreon supporter, you get the full signs. I'm thinking like maybe when we play, when we do stroker fight songs on the podcast, they only get a little sample of the song if you're not a subscriber. I mean, they're playing the Spotify, people are paying 399, just let them have it. But they can't download it like this Patriot listeners like because I know I know some people like our buddy listener Tim. He downloaded No Wrong Hole and made it his fucking ringtone. That's a great song by Spotify.

19:14 People can't do that. That's true. That's true, that's true. But so we'll get that up on Spotify over on Patreon so you can hear the whole song and then we'll make sure we play all the songs, I guess for the Spotify people since the end because they deserve it. But if you're paying for it, I guess maybe. Because the Patreon people, they've been there, you know, for so long, like Spotify, this is a brand new thing. Like you got a reward people for sticking around and paying, you know, like 6 bucks a month. Because I'm sure a lot of these people have been doing it since the beginning. Well, it's 399 on Patreon, it's 590 or 399 on Spotify, 599 on Patreon if you want to really support show. So get on over there and do that. Also, Hey, hey, look, is that a new gun? Is that a new gun? Strokes have it next to me today. It's good.

19:57 You should always. Everybody show your weapons. Anybody got weapons in there upstairs? I just. Thought mine's damn mine's in my. I could see it from where it is. It's at. It's when do you start doing. Weapon J we know. Just show weapons. We do, actually. That's a great idea. When 2 N comes back, because she has some, she's got some some weapons as well. We can start. We start showing off our weapons. And we make it. Right. And come to our house and be fucking hilarious. We got a bunch of comments and a couple of voicemails and I want to get to before we move on to the rest of the show. So let's do this first. Not that damn show. Don't you want to leave us a message on that damn voicemail? Yeah, I can tell you how to leave us a message on that damn voicemail. Call 916312 DAM and damn 916312 DAM and damn. All right, so the I believe the first voicemail is a little long.

20:45 The second one is open. It's a story. So you just it's not it's not a terrible story. It's it's our old or not our old, but it's the hype guy, Matt, hey. MTV. Nope, that's not. See, that's wrong. This is. This is actually somebody else. Poor decision damn it. Here, Quick question for you. Have you all taken some Southern Comfort line? Some hot dam. Some Everclear. Mix that together with some Orange Jubilee. MD 2020. No. That. Sounds terrible. That sounds like a really bad idea, yeah. Let us know how that went if you can remember him. He, this is this guy. He's he's got a TikTok called, I think it's called bad decisions or poor decisions, something like that. And that's what he does, is he mixes a bunch of alcohol together and tries it out.

21:33 That sounds like a really bad idea. I kind of want to watch it. It's pretty interesting stuff. It's pretty interesting. It's a huge fan. All right, so here's Matt. Damn it, hype man Matt here today. I don't know why I decided to do this, but I just kind of punished myself by listening to how bad 98 Rock continues to be. But that made me think of a little story time. A million years ago I was an intern at 98 Rock, and one night we were out in Roseville and we were doing an event giving away Nickelback tickets. They were coming later that summer, a group of drunk females. Come up to me and the the girl that was getting married was like Oh my God, like what are you guys doing here? Oh my God.

22:22 Nickelback tickets. What do I got to do to get these tickets? And I was like, well, we haven't really quite set up yet. My manager was inside this and that, kind of like trying to tell her that I personally don't have the Nickelback tickets. She was like, what if I show you my tits, will I get the tickets? Then sure, why not? She had a nice pair of tits and her drunken friends were like. Hey, we got to go. Their party bus was leaving so she showed me. Your tapes and she didn't get Nickelback tickets? The joys of interning in radio. Yeah, show us your pussy. I don't know why that was one of the biggest things that just, I wouldn't say it like grinded my gears, but it's just like, what do I need to do to get you people to understand We don't carry tickets on our person.

23:18 I will be honest with there was moments in time where I actually had a couple of stacks of tickets in my pockets for things and there I'd be out and about someone, be like hey, you know, whatever, and I give them a pair of tickets. I don't know why I would have them, but it actually did happen. Not anymore though, because nobody has physical tickets anymore for anything. It's all digital shit nowadays. Yeah, I try to block out that whole other than the fact that I enjoyed us working together. I should have blocked out that radio station in my head mentally. Dude so much. Horrible. I tried to block out the the one I just got fired from back in August, but I had left my phone at home. I was I was taking my girlfriend home. She came over here, it's like maybe 12:30 at night. I drive her home. She lives like a mile and a half away and it's dead silent in my car. And I'm like, all right, let's see what they're doing. It was the gayest pop punk emo songs you could he listened to. I'm like, this is not rock'n'roll, that's embarrassing.

24:09 And I wanted to, I wanted to laugh so hard it almost made me cry, but I was so tired. It just made me mad. Well, you know, I I I don't want to get into all the details, but over the week I said I sent a message. I said, did you guys see this? Because it was about a former employee who got another DUI. Yeah. And I was like, did you guys see this? Because I don't, I don't follow and keep up with Reddit and keep up with that stuff. So I was like, is this real? And it was, I was just thinking like the amount of like Vince Richards, I have to say it too. And I like him. But Fox, they enabled that shit so bad, it allowed that to take place. And I know that they, I know that that person's going through a lot, losing someone, but you're also going to kill somebody.

24:56 And they've enabled that. They enabled all of that. And it really just pisses me off to think about what we had to go through. Dude, tell me about it. Like we were treated poorly and we were fucking, we were out there fighting to to win and and we were doing things that other shows weren't doing and then but they were just babying and coddling this fucking guy who is a total piece of shit. What pissed me off the most was we were there for like 5 years and we were always considered the new show. I'm like it's been how long? Why are y'all still treating us this way? But no, it was. Really stupid. I don't want to talk about radio just. Shitty sales. Honestly just shitty salespeople. Yeah, that's true. That's true. But I. I still deal with that sometimes a day. Like it's still like, yeah, just people just don't like your news.

25:41 Like why are you not telling me you got everything you need? So stupid. For those that don't know, just go, go fucking find the Reddit thread and read what's going on, because there's because I know Ian, you said you want to talk about I don't really want to either, but man, that's that whole story with that guy. That old morning host has has is disgusting and it's incredible. It is. It is shocking, the fact to fall, to fall from where you were at, to just allow yourself to get to that way. It's really sad. I am sorry for the loss, but yeah, you can't kill people on the highway. Nope that's crazy all right they got a bunch of comments to get to this one come to get some emails too that have come in.

26:22 This is from Ron. It says all right, gang, all right, the gang is hilarious and I want to support you this capital want. So the question is is I hate not being able to watch the video content on on pocket casts. I don't know what Pocket Casts is, but I think it's an I. Don't know what that is. But we are available on pretty much all platforms so that would make sense. So he's asking if he should either support us through Spotify or Patreon. He said which one supports you all the best? Spotify is already in use and I hate the Patreon app, but if Patreon is better for the gang I'll suck it up. He says. Thank you for all for cracking me up through my shifts working with assholes. So you get a little more behind the scenes with Patreon, right, But Spotify is a cheaper version. You just get pretty much the show, if I'm correct, right, that's.

27:07 Yeah, that's exactly it, yeah. So really, that's your choice. Yeah, it's up to you. If Spotify, you're. Supporting us. Yeah, either way, we appreciate it. So if Spotify is easier for you, which is why we did this, is because I know a lot of people do use Spotify, then that's not then just go for Spotify. That's fine. But if you want to get in, if you want to be a little bit more into a, into the community that's on Patreon, get some of the behind the scenes stuff, some of the rants that I post, Ian, Ian does his food reviews, things like that and whatever other new stuff we put on this year. Then join Patreon. You know, it's your, it's really your choice. That's a bitch about karaoke from time to time just because y'all are pretty much tired of it. So I was like, yeah, I'll just put it on Patreon. Yeah, maybe start out with Spotify and if you want more than you can just move over, you know what I mean?

27:50 Like you got always upgrade, Yeah. That's true. That's. Basically what it is I heard a lot, I'm sure you guys may have too, but a lot of people was at last last Tuesday's episode where we did the Happy cries. People fucking loved that shit. People were all about it when we were doing those. Were real people and they want that they want to know that we're we're not just, you know, the the haha Dicks, pussies, butt holes. No, we have emotions. We are also that, yes, let's be real, but so because we we didn't get messages about about happy cries, Renee says. After hearing the stories about happy cries, I thought of mine and she said I put my sweet dog down in April 2025 after 17 years of companionship. I miss her every day. She was a rescue from Stockton and seriously the best dog ever.

28:32 My son who's 28, he was 11 when we brought her home, made it, made a donation for the rescue in her hand, blah. Basically he's. Blah blah blah her her happy cry. Then my daughter 26 sorry I just didn't didn't read that part and so anyway it was the first present I opened and ugly cried the the donation that her son head mates. Sorry, I didn't mean to blah blah blah. You Renee. How? Dare you? Then my daughter, 26, who was 9, gave me a digital frame loaded with pictures of the dog. It was a cry fest all around. I. Know I'm going to cry when Dexter goes. Fuck, I don't even like to think about when the cats go. I don't really care about when the I have two dogs and one of them, either one of them goes is going to be upsetting. I never thought I'd be this dog person but I I see why I. Remember you fighting tooth and nail against her getting a dog because she wanted one for so long? Then you get this tiny little fucking Pokémon size dog. And.

29:28 Then you got and once you got the backpack for the dog with the with the view hole so you could take it on motorcycle rides, I was like, that's it for him. Yeah, yeah, we. So I'm still trying to hunt down an asshole that lives over here in this area where I live. A my Co host on the actual radio, she's walking her dog and then she's able to get a Ring camera footage. Some asshole come by and clipped her dog and hit it and left. So she had to run the dog to the vet. Yeah, the dog's fine, just, you know, just had to take some medications. But some asshole just hit the fucking dog and left. That's insane. That's. Nearly hit her. Like if you watch the video, nearly hit her. I'm like, oh that's awful. So we're looking for a white issue, I'm supposed. To say is she posting it on Facebook because I'll share that shit.

30:13 We did, yeah. I shared it and we all shared it. We can't. The cops. There you go. I mean, how much investigation they going to do? Yeah, but if the Internet gets involved. I'd like to, I mean, yeah, because. I mean, I want you to think about this. In the entirety of four movies, John Wick killed like 1000 people because one dog died and no one cared. Pretty makes sense, Matthew here says. Ironstone Amphitheatre at Murphy's, California hosts an annual cow pie social, AKA Cow Shit Bingo. 25 bucks a square. Did we hear anybody that has chickens or cows that would do this? We could do it live on Facebook.

30:54 Do we hear anything? One of the damage posted on patron and said another damage she knows has has chickens but that's as far as it went. Lovely. Danny, damn it, Danny said that. For the record, I don't have Ian's personal phone number, but if someone wants to give it to me, I can definitely work up a good protein. I think we were trying to get Danny to send you a picture of his poop maybe? I. Don't remember but that sounds like US. I will try that D Nice says thanks for the morning tears again back to the the happy cries. I'm definitely a crier. Love you guys. I'm going to make it make more people cry is. That another guy. That's a guy, I think. So there's another guy. This guy Ryan right here is love the conversation of happy cries. Jen's story reminds me of my youngest son. On senior night he was doing cheer and he did not fill me in about senior night until the day of. I had to go to HR for approval to allow me to leave early to go watch.

31:47 When they announced his name, all of the students screamed so much louder than the other kids. I was always shy in school so it was awesome seeing that. Then a few months ago, he informs me that in that Army recruiters, recruiters are tough. He was walking by their office and they kicked the door open and the next thing you know, he's going to Sacramento from Carson City to do some testing. He leaves for the Army on March 30th. Being a dad can be can bring great moments and pride along with stress made my eyes a little wise. You know, good for your son. Man, That's that's awesome. Thank you for that. We appreciate him to go serve the country. It's that's if one of my kids would have told me they were doing that, I don't know how I would have reacted. I don't know.

32:29 But I do wish, but at the same time I don't want it. I do wish I would have though. I know, me too. Just five years. Yeah, you get a little money, you get, you know. That's why I married. That's why I got married. I got I'm about to get military insurance. Don't. Say that's why. No, I'm just. Kidding, got married. No, she's, she's like, you know what? We only have $100 deductible in all of us. I'm like what? Fucking awesome man. This. Shitty radio station has got terrible insurance. I can get what I've never. Worked for a radio station that had good insurance. It's my wife works for Kaiser and her insurance is fucking great. I. Bet Yeah, yeah, no, she was telling me. But I'm going for real.

33:11 For real? Yeah. Oh yeah, that's cool. Yeah, that's nice. And no and no help with your loans, your school student loans like what I do. That's what I'm saying. Let's get married tomorrow. And then you did. Another comment here is this from Jeremy says the first thing that came to mind about vag mints inserts instead of certs the the candy certs. Remember those? He just called them inserts. Vagina. Mints. #Dollar idea, Ali says. Vag smell does not happen because you don't shower, it's because there's an internal problem with your vag hole. I like the word fat chol, but I'm.

33:52 Sure, I'm sure showering probably helps. And then she calls you out stroke and she says, why do fat people have to be at Walmart stroke? Why can't they be at Target or the mall? Because fat people don't go there. I've never seen a fat person hardly in Target buying a frozen pizza fat. People at Target, I see fat people at the mall all the fucking time. I'm for real. I mean, yeah, a couple more comments here, Josh said. I had an art teacher all the way from elementary school to high school. She would just transfer and get better positions. Her name was Miss Wellman, but my God, everyone called her Miss Whale back. That ass could shake Africa, Dale. Fuck, dude.

34:34 OK. All right. Last one, this is Ali again. She says these haters, are we talking about the haters? So the haters are funny I and she quotes I hate them, but I know everything that's going on with them. Obviously, they listen to our show. Obviously. Hi haters. Yeah. Hi, haters. We appreciate you guys tuning in. You're probably our biggest supporters. That's that. That was the weirdest thing because like, I didn't know because like, because like we make fun of that morning show all the time. I know nothing about what they sound like. Because like I said, I've only listened like 20 minutes, but this person was like, they knew that you and Jen and Mandy and Kyle were friends. Like I we're on this show and we didn't know that. Yeah, this person is. They were obsessed, but either.

35:17 Way you know what, these people are stupid. You bought his Turkey brine and brine and it was and it was fucking white label. Let me explain that for you stupid fucks. That means people don't understand that he slapped the label onto something that was already a product that we could buy right now and slap our label on it. And you were fooled for years because you're a dumb ass. Yeah, unfortunately, guys, you know, I think this it it Leela's leader in this podcast. We will pull back the fucking curtain on some radio stuff and we post it online. And but that is a true fact right there. Which stroke said that white label shit. I mean, it's something that we could do right now. We could do that with. We could. Put our name on a wine bottle. I mean, it's so fucking easy. It's like, dude, you didn't you think if they were making the the the gravier of the Turkey brine, you think it would have got out of Don's house?

36:02 She'd have ate it all? Sorry. Oh shit, I said that. It's fun like I'm like they're not the only people that do that. Like that wing place that stroke took us to which I still haven't forgiven him for. I'm 90% sure those were Tyson Nuggets my girlfriend ordered that just came out of a freezer bag like 20 minutes before we ordered them. Yeah, slap our name on it in TDs. There you go. Boom. Yeah, a lot of radio people, a lot of podcasters do stuff like that, and then they just sell it as their own product. I mean, we could if we really wanted to cough. But no, like, yeah, no, these hats that that Mikey and I are wearing, these are ours. These were made. This is not white label anything. These were made here. Selling Lube? We could. We could want TDs Lube.

36:44 Oh wait, every time everybody's about to fuck, they see our picture. Oh my. God that'd be fucking hilarious. Grab the Lube. Grab the NTDS, Lube the. Last thing I want to do is see your faces when you're about to fuck. Instant fucking boner. Gone. Gone. Instant impotent. All right, if you ever want to leave a comment or voicemail, you know what to do. You can just click the link in the description and give us a call. Whatever, fucking just just do it because we read them back and no matter what they say, you can leave them on Patreon, you can leave them on Spotify, you can leave them online, you can do whatever you got to do and we will read them. But now I think, Ian, you have a list for us, am I right?

37:26 Every once in a while I like to because it happens to me. It happens to you guys. Every once in awhile there's something that just makes you feel old and. Usually my kid. Yeah, just recently, I think it was two or three days ago, because stroke's daughter and my baby mama's daughter are the same age. She's not my daughter, but they're the same age. And she just turned 15 and I went fuck, I feel so old because I because I, I met her when she was like 3 or 4 and I went, oh God, it's been that long. Fuck me, I am old. Dude, my daughter said to me the other day, she goes, you were alive during the Cold War. I was like, what?

38:06 Fuck you don't. Fuck you. And who the fuck do you think you are? Tell me I'm just alive. And she was right. I've been alive since well. Still, you don't say that like God. Things. Oh, they like to just tell you're old. I thought my parents were old in their 30s, You know, I thought they were old. Now I'm old, but and. I before I get to this list, to anyone that I ever said was old, that was in their 30s when I was a kid, I am so stuck because I'm 35I deeply apologize for that. Those people are probably dead now, but still. So this is a couple of things that that will be turning 20 years old this year. So damn. It this is going to make me feel really, really old. Yeah, like for example, movie wise, the movies, the movie Cars will be turning 20 years old this year. No way, swear to God.

38:56 Yeah, the movie holding. Up the movie holds up. The fucking ride at Disneyland holds up. It's one of the best rides. Oh. That's a great ride, I know, but 20 years? High school musicals turning 20 this year. Well, I didn't know I that, that I don't care about, but that's I feel like that was only like 10 years ago maybe. And Pirates of the Caribbean 2 is 20 years old this year. Damn, that feels like to me though, that feels like forever ago. Pirates of the Caribbean 2 I I mean, it almost feels like it should have been even longer ago to me. I. Remember seeing the first one in the theater and I was like 13 and I thought am I allowed to watch this Because it got pretty violent, which I loved but I was like that. It surprised me how violent this movie was for a Disney film.

39:38 Yeah, and let's give up to Johnny Depp. He came out of that divorce and that whole trial and that lady's career is done 'cause she shit in his bed. I would just say I like wouldn't give her credit to another man out there. He won. He kicks ass dude. He he, he definitely won. Music wise, the song Sexy Back is turning 20 years old. Oh Jesus. Wow. Yeah. Shakira's Hips Don't Lie is turning 20 years old and Crazy by Gnarls Barkley, which we used to play on 98 Rock for God knows what fucking reason. That's 20 years old. Yeah.

40:18 Oh my God. Why did we play that on 98 Rock? I don't loose. Yourself. I don't remember. It was one of those things that, you know, Peterman was always like, we want to, you know, we want to make people be like, what the fuck? Why are they playing this? It was he. He always was like we the hits, play the hits, even if it's not. It wasn't the worst. I mean, it wasn't the worst 'cause he was playing Eminem and it wasn't the worst. It would just break it up. Especially when you play in fucking Evanescence over and over and over and over. No, fuck Evanescence. Wake. Me up. Yeah, seriously. But the the one I couldn't stand was how, how often it was almost every fucking day at 4:00, coming out of a commercial break, that fucking stained song would play, remember?

41:01 We tried to call him out, call out the PD for that, and then he was like, no, it moves. I move it all. I move it around you. Maybe you move it 10 minutes. Yeah, every. Day, every day and and I and we and we would. It could almost be a drinking game at that point because I was like every time, like thank God there it's not an open rafter concept because I would have hung myself days ago from how many times I had to hear that fucking song. If I never hear it again, I'll be fine. I would I would like to say I've never met a rock radio personality that enjoyed Evanescence. I was just thinking Oh my Co host on the regular radio she hates it. I know all of you have said how much you hate it. I I'm out of. Radio and I still hear it because people want to sing it at the bar.

41:45 Yeah, like every time it comes home, it's like, please stop. Yeah, song sucks. TV shows Heroes, which I did not watch, is turning 20 years old. Oh. My God, really? That Yeah, I remember that show. That was a pretty decent show. I watched the first season. It was pretty good. I love this show, I still do. Psych is turning 20 years old. I thought that shows way I'm going to lie. And Dexter is turning 20 years old. Fuck. I did not see that coming, God. Damn I don't watch. I didn't watch my my. Earbuds Dexter Dexter's turning 20 years old this year. It doesn't seem like it.

42:27 No. And I loved, I mean I love it. Still holds up. 20 years ago, Pluto was declassified as a planet. I remember that they lied to us. Isn't it a planet again? Didn't they say, well, you know what, it's a planet now. Technically it's considered a dwarf planet, but I'm still I, I, I tell my kid like when he, if he ever comes home needing to make a solar system, I'll be like, no, we're putting Pluto in that motherfucker. I don't care. Fuck what your teacher says. Because if we're still calling it we, we don't call. We didn't, we didn't give anything else a name, but we still call it Pluto because some people just can't let go. Like me. I was taught for 15 years that Pluto was a planet, and I'll be damned if anybody's going to tell me it's not. What made them say it wasn't like what happened? All this was was.

43:13 Too small. Get out of here. Fuck off. Steve Irwin was killed by a Stingray 20 years ago. God. Damn. Wow, it's been that long? Everyone sounds like. His son this has been the the 2025 was like the year for his son. Did you guys hear like he? Went like Dancing with the Stars or something, yeah. He went Dancing with the Stars is like everybody loves that guy. And I watched a little bit of that because my wife loved it. And I was like, this dude is a really good dancer. He seems like such a really good. They they his whole family seems like good people. If they brought back the crocodile Hunter, I'd watch the shit out of it. Yeah, Especially if it was his it. But that's the only way it works. It has to be his family or his kid. No one else can be the Crocodile Hunter. People would.

43:54 I mean, it's 20 years later, but I still can't get over the fact that a Stingray got him. I know of all things. Yeah, that's crazy. 20 years ago, the Nintendo Wii was released. God, we used to play the hell out of that back in the day. Yeah. And subsequently somebody lost their life 20 years ago, I'm assuming with we for a we, I don't know what. I don't think it was 20 years ago, was it? Oh fuck it. Yeah, I think it was pretty. Damn close. I know we never got to kill a listener, thank God. We still can. There's still time, guys. It's podcast now. I think we're good. We can. Do whatever we want, we'll kill them for fun.

44:35 I was always afraid because you know you, you, you. We hear from people all the time they have to pull over because they're laughing so hard. I was always worried about killing somebody because we made them laugh so hard they got distracted and ran off the side of the road. Do you get upset or do you? Are you proud of yourself or something like that? Yes. I guess they probably sue us and then we worked at Odyssey. They'd have been like, you guys should not be funny. That's the thing like there's, there are these, there's these, there's these lawsuits that everybody makes fun of. But there there was a lawsuit where I think somebody sued a theme park. It was either. It was, I think it was Universal. What for scaring her too much? Could you sue us for making you laugh too hard? That would be great. That would be great. Gross.

45:15 Oh, I'd. Wear that with a badge of honor. Yeah, yeah, that'd be a good loss I'd. Be kind of proud of that. Like please publish this please. I'll share it and I'll give you one more. Twitter debuted 20 years ago on March 21st. I, I still, I still call it Twitter. I don't give a fuck. I know Mikey goes there for his news but I hate fucking X Twitter X whatever I I. Go there daily and it's that's where I see stuff and you know, people trying to, you know, talk shit about Candace Owens and there's all kinds of great. Like the place is hilarious. That guy. I just have to tell you that is the place where all the If you think Reddit is bad, holy shit, Twitter is fucking great. Twitter lets you put your titties into coochie on the Internet like they don't care.

45:59 That's true. Yeah. So, all right, those, that's a lot of things turning 20. Yeah, my, my back hurts just reading that. Damn, we are getting old. Oh. Damn dude. Guess I need to start shopping for that plot of land to bury myself in. I. Know, dude, hi. Now your wife will do it for you. So 20 years ago was what, 2006? 2006 five 2006 I was like 3. Four years in the radio, I was young, I was AI. Was a sophomore. I was I was getting ready to move to California for my second radio job or third radio job.

46:42 I was in high school listening to Stroke on the radio. That's. Horrible. Please don't ever. Please go tame that I. Can't help. It fuck that was a long time ago man. It was. Those were the times, though. Those were the good old days, and then that was good. The end of the good old days of radio. Right. Yeah, it was. And I remember, like there was things you could say still in movies when you watched the two early 2000 movies. You still hear certain words you like. Yeah. 'Cause like 2006, 2000, that that's, that's like the years of like Anchorman and and Ricky Bobby and, you know, movies that still took a chance, 'cause like, that was like the last good decade for comedies, in my opinion, Yeah.

47:26 Oh yeah, for sure. There's nobody doing. There's nobody. Do we even make comedies anymore? They. Do. But they don't, A, they don't make as much money and B they go straight to streaming where like we've said before, they don't put as much effort into being funny as they used to 'cause they used to have. They used to have what we call in the business writers. Now you just hire somebody that can improv through an entire movie, and that's not as fun. Yeah, and once Brokeback Mountain came out, it just queered it all up and came. Movies are just awful. I didn't see that it was. About that time when? Did that movie come out? No who come up with that movie? Like 2 Cowboys just holding each other and Dick in their mouth. That's what's called Oscar bait, OK? I never watched it.

48:09 I was like I. Don't, I don't remember what year it came out, but what I do remember is I was, yeah. Because I, I think I was in high school listening to Stroke and he, I think he was talking about people were protesting that movie at our local theater. Really. Yeah, I don't know queer stuff around here. Queer cab boys. Yeah, I remember listening to Stroke on the radio talking about that movie. Oh my God, that's fucking hilarious. I'm trying to see what year that came out now since we brought that up. Let's see, people. Fucking protested Brokeback Mountain? Are you sure? Yeah. We don't live in California. You know. Things are a little different in Florida. Like what? The queers?

48:51 I got them queers. Can you imagine tricking some way to go with me? Brokeback Mountain came out in 2005. Can you imagine tricking a redneck to go in there and he's like watching the movie and he's like, what the fuck? Go check out this that would. Be fun. That would be a lot of two. 1005, 2005 So yeah, ever since then, everything went queer. Damn, how about that? Everything queer. Everything went fake and gay. Everything's fake and gay. Yeah. Even the show stroke wax asshole. I know you've watched the early movies. I mean, I'm just using the word like they moved, they're using the movie. They would say fag and it had nothing to do with being gay. They would just say it, you know what I mean?

49:31 Like it'd be like who being a fag, It had nothing to do with being gay. I don't. Think anybody's ever in a movie that I've ever watched called a gay person that ever? It's no I. Don't think so either. It's always just. I've seen gay people call themselves that before. And it and. It was hysterical, dude. Oh my God. Because like, because when I was in college, there were some friends that a bunch of us got together because they were going to vote on gay marriage. So we went down there to the, to some of the voting centers to, to hype it up. And we're like, yes, you know, let legalize gay marriage, these two, these two guys walk by and we're like, excuse me, are you in favor of gay marriage?

50:13 And they're like, we're fags. What do you think? And I went, I, I about pissed my fans. I laughed so fucking hard when they when he said that. We used to work with a guy and he would call out other guys that were too gay. Like he's super gay. Remember John? Johnny. Yes. I didn't make. Fun of him? Well, this guy. This guy was gay and we worked with him for like 8 months before we even knew that because he's like, yeah, my husband and all this. And I'm like, you're what? And I and I ran to the next room. I'm like stroke, did you know John was gay? And he's like, no, I'm like John, come here, tell Stroke what you just told me. And we were like, what? That's crazy. No way. There are some, there's just are some gay guys that just have a really good sense of humor about things or some that are that don't actually harass you all the time like Orphan Andrew used to do. Oh.

51:01 Yeah. I love Orphan. He's he's, I mean, I'm not trying to, you know, get him in any shit. He was good people. He's sexy. He was cool. Everybody all the time. Yeah. Like John was cool, but he would go, he would go, that guy's being so fagged and I'm like, you're gay. You can't say that. Like I guess. He can't say that. As I say, that's almost their N word. Yeah, pretty much. Right. And is that what it is? He's making us gays look bad. I'm like, because he's too gay. I like when. He what's funny is he would even say that about his husband because his husband like because our, our friend John, you know, you could not tell by hanging out with him for for hours. You would not be able to tell. But his husband would come in. Yeah, yeah.

51:45 But his husband, he literally would say sometimes it's like he's too gay for for the for what we're like. He's like, he's acting super gay right now. But I love them both. His husband does my taxes which is hilarious. Yeah, he has great. He has great vocals. That's for all the Dicks sucking. Yeah, we tell. I tell him that to his face, though, because he's a good guy. Yeah, I miss that dude. Fucking all that Dick. I wouldn't even know how to suck a Dick. I'm like, he should go off of my mouth anytime. He's going to do it the way you'd want it to be done to you, right? I don't know, the whole time I'm thinking, is this bitch about to go off? That would always be in the back of my mind.

52:26 But yeah, at the same time, like there, I guess we got to bring it back our like our for $1,000,000. Would you do it? For a million. Yeah. Hey, man, a million's a million. I know I wouldn't be good at giving somebody head, though. I'd be like, yeah, like. This isn't based. On I'd be the worst blowjob ever gave Yeah, like it's. It's not based on performance. It's just you do it and it's over and you get the money. First of all, I want to. I don't want to see, I don't want to, I don't want to see him. I want to see the check the whole time. I want to see that check. I want to look at the check as I'm like.

53:08 But if it's 1,000,000 bucks, I don't know that I'd be able to turn it down. It's a lot of money. Do your balls tickled? Do you want your balls tickled? That's another another. You're going to have to give me another million for that. Yeah, I. Need Jen here. Walking out a room with Dick breath. Pop off a piece of my Dick. There it is. Let's move on. Yeah, we should move on because we stroke brought up a really good idea. He's brought this up a bunch of times and we never really did it, but it was you. Don't listen. Basically what happened in your town this week, or we all just kind of find one really crazy out, just outrageous story that happened in our town or at least around our town. No.

53:51 Because nothing happens and I I live in Rockland. That's. What I'm saying, are you going to go Rockland or Sacramento or Cleveland because you, I don't know what you claim to be your hometown. I couldn't. Win Cleveland. I even think about that. I but I I thought you were. In Cleveland I should have win Cleveland if if. 2 N was here. I would definitely do Cleveland. So when we play this game again and when when she comes back, you can have Sacramento area and I'll do. This. I think I won this one this week. Well, all right. Well then, do you want to go first or do you want to go last? Don't matter, I'm still going to win because this story is so fucking crazy that it's like. If yours is that we'll save yours for last then, because, because I, I think that that if it's going to be that good, then it is what it is. Ian's I know already know a little bit of and it's kind of depressing, I think.

54:34 So why don't you go first, Ian, and then I'll go. We'll just go, we'll go ahead and get this out of the way. A fire broke out at the Zoo World Zoological Park on Front Beach Rd. here in Panama City Beach, claiming the lives of seven lemurs. Yeah, that's sad. Yeah. Not only that, this is also the same town that last year our aquarium killed 4 dolphins. We should not be housing animals on Panama City Beach. We are so fucking bad at it. It's not the same place, right? No, no, no. These are two separate places, but they used to take us to both of those places on field trips. Like we go to Zoo World like in the spring and then like in the in the fall we go to whatever. Like that's just, this is where we went when we were kids and what?

55:21 Do you mean is a lemur? I don't worry, I gotta Google. This is what my my cat, yeah. Lemur a little bit. So they died from. They didn't die necessarily in the fire. It was the smoke that took him out. Yeah. They thought it was 6, but then the next day he was like, Nope, it was 7. I'm like, oh great, that's sadder. Yeah. And I know, I know a firefighter who was on the scene and it nearly broke his heart because he's like loves animals. So it really hurt him a lot. I'm just. Going to show it but I won't. No, I won't show but. Yeah, a lot of people were were seriously concerned because my girlfriend, she was like, is the giraffe OK? I hope the giraffe's OK. I'm like, I'm sure it is.

56:01 But I mean, yeah, it was, it was a big deal around here. Damn, that's that's sad. My story is not sad at all, but it's pretty frustrating for people who have to ride the RT. If you were stranded this past week in Sacramento taking the public transportation, you can blame some copper thirsty dirtbag who decided to treat Sacramento's train system like a fucking scrap yard. Here's my Here's my rendition of what this guy might actually look like he looks like. Rickety cricket. This could potentially be him, maybe not, I don't know AI made this, but the story is multiple sections of the gold line got jacked for copper wiring and I'm talking about actual signal and power wires, not just some shit off a fence or whatever. They forced the trains to shut down. People had to get get off mid route and figure out how the fuck they're going to get to basically walk or find another ride.

56:54 I don't feel what the fuck you're going to do So this isn't your this guy. He like you know people steal catalytic converters and stuff for the for the copper. This guy was stealing basically train tracks like public transportation that gets used on a daily basis. This guy's in there stealing this shit to go sell it for, you know, probably fucking crack or whatever. I don't understand this. Why is copper so expensive? It didn't. I don't feel like people were stealing. Everything. When people weren't stealing copper when I was a kid, were they? I don't know if you just didn't worry about it, but yeah, copper just goes in fucking everything. That's why people steal it, and you can get a good price for it.

57:35 I didn't even know people stole catalytic converters till I moved to California. I'm like, what the fuck is that? I don't know. Yeah. That doesn't happen around here like it does in California. Yeah, I. Don't I think they're, I don't know that they're on all cars, are they? I think they're only on. Cars, I have no idea because like, I didn't know what that was. And it happened to a friend of mine when I lived out there. I didn't know what that meant. She's like, I can't. Someone stole my catalytic converter. I'm like, well, we've got hot water if you want to use our shower. I didn't know what that fucking meant. Well, this people steal it for the, the, the, the copper and they sell it for like, you know, 50 bucks a fucking spool or whatever. And then they go just go buy crack or who knows what the fuck they do with it. But they ended up catching one of these guys. Apparently there was more than one of them, but the, the RT, the SAC RT was shut down near sunrise and Folsom and downtown. But there's they're still trying to fix all this shit so. Your if your day got.

58:26 Ruined. You can. You can be ruined by this crackhead. That's the weirdest. On stroke I got to know. I will say this before, before you go on stroke, there was another there. There was a couple other stories because I don't get called out by people and I realized that there was some crazy fucking. There was like a really bad fire and a couple of things. I just don't want to get to those because there was deaths. Well. Fire in California. You're blowing my mind. Yeah. Yeah, but somebody died and it was not good, so there. So I feel like an asshole. Yeah, well anyway, but go on stroke. All right, I'll bring it up. This is right down the street from me, like within a mile, this place. On Tuesday, police responded to a place called Palms of the Emerald Coast Massage Parlor to investigate an alleged attack.

59:08 Someone from the Department of Health was there and they were kind of doing their, like, inspection. Make sure everything was, you know, properly done. And the cops had to show up because the the people from the Department of Health called them. A woman was showing her ass. Her name is her name is almost unbelievable, but her name is. I want to make sure I get this right. Wang Wang, Hang Wang. I'm not making that up. That's. Fucking great. Yeah, I'm not making this up. Yeah. Hang Wang. So they showed up and the cops showed up. They tried to cuff the woman, Fang Wang, she began. Here's where I'm confused by the story.

59:49 Please help me. This is the police report defecating towards the officers in an attempt to avoid being arrested. Towards them like was she like that's? All she asked to I point my ass at. You and fire. I don't feel like poop shoots out like that, it just I feel like it would just fall. Have you ever had beer shits? All right, you know what? That is valid. I have had. It was rode in the police report defecating towards the officers in an attempt to avoid being arrested. So I'm picturing ass running backwards. I don't know and just. Backing up towards them like. Won't fuck with me, I'm going to shoot my poopy. Oh. Yeah, it didn't work. She was arrested for battery. By the way, this place, Palms of Emerald Coast, was previously called Classy Spa. Before that it.

1:00:34 Was not anymore, she just downgraded them. Classy spa they. Lost a few stars, let me tell you. Yep. Yeah, so she's running an ass backward shit and trying to shit on cops. I mean, you're right, that story wins. That's. I mean, I was so happy. I I was like, this story is going to go national and it did this week. I was like you. Know what on the on the on the on the Florida scale. I I got to give that one a mug shot. Dolphin. Yeah, if that didn't make it, it would have made it in Florida news for sure. Oh my God, if you are not on Patreon or even Spotify now watching the video, you just missed the most random thing that Ian has ever put on the screen before. I was so confused.

1:01:17 I was like, what was? That put that back up there. This is your Florida scale and it's a it's a a fucking dolphin on. The Florida On the Florida scale, this gets a mug shot dolphin. Mug shot dolphin. What's the Florida scale? How? How do we know with like? Shit in the words officer trying to shit on them. I would say that's a 10. What's what's the worst possible thing that you could get on the Florida scale? It's the. Florida scale. So it really just depends on what you did. Only thing she could do was like shit in her hand and then wipe it on their faces. I mean, that's I can't think. Of anything worse, like for example, like because yours, your story Mikey does have Florida elements to it definitely sounds like something like somebody's stealing copper off a train. Yeah, that sounds like something that could happen in Florida. And I would give that 1A mullet Gator. Oh my God.

1:02:09 That's perfect as this. That looks like somebody or a a Gator that would steal. Yeah. Put Copper Guy back up there and we'll compare the 2. There, there he is, right there. And there he is, right there that they're the, they're the same person. Yeah, they are. That's hilarious. 3000 miles away, but they are the same people. Holy shit, that's funny as hell. I love the Florida scale. We got to keep that. We can bring that up. I'll. Keep the Florida scale. Porter Scale's great. Great. Well, I guess you wait. If we keep doing this, maybe we should we should start doing it. No, we won't do it this week, but when when 2 ends back and we keep doing this, we could put it for a vote for the damage and let them pick. Put a poll up. But pick which one, yeah. Whose city's more fucked up this week? This week, whose city's more fucked up? I. Mean, I think mine won, but you know, I'm so happy. Won.

1:02:51 Yeah, there's no I. Was so happy by that story to be down the street. I'm like, this is awesome. I did. I mean, I'm Wang fame Wayne. I can admit that I I did, I didn't look too hard because that's the biggest thing that happened in our hometown this week because that's that's all anybody was talking about for for days. That's big news, yeah. Anyway. Anyway, let's move on. We do. We haven't done this in a little while. I don't think we've done it all year. As cheesy as that. All year. Let's do a fucking Craigslist, man. You got a list of those? It's been a while. My deepest desire is. There a place on the web that panders to my lust. Too desirable. Craig's Lust. And I know, I know that we give them shout outs every once in a while, but I just wanted to to decentralize this Craig's lust to the biggest little city in the world, Reno, NV.

1:03:42 We know they're big over there. And you, if you have a town that you want me to feature on Craigslist, leave it in the comments of this episode and I will read it and I will and I'll and I'll see what I can do. Was this a this was a damn it suggested, wasn't it a damn it? Say do Reno once I do. Believe so, but I wanted to do it just because we we've been growing in that area and I want us to continue to grow in that area. In Reno. Looking to entertain in my well equipped playroom. This is a 68 year old man experienced master in between slaves right now. I did not like saying that. I'm going to be honest. Have a turn the music down.

1:04:25 Have a very well equipped playroom with new fucking machine, handheld machine, milking machine. Wide variety of floggers, whips, toys, vibes, Electro and sharps. Only interested in female and but we'll consider couples. No strings, just fun. Respecting limits yet pushing boundaries. Discretion assured. Milking machine. That's what I thought. I'm glad you brought that back up. What the hell is even is that? Like a machine that sucks you off I guess. I was assuming like a breast pump or something but it could be anything he. Could have just said breast pump milking machine sounds so weird I. Mean, I guess daddy's milk tastes funny. That's pissed off.

1:05:17 Look at her and see any ladies into water sports, no? Probably not. That's a 40 year old man looking for a woman into water sports. Parentheses piss play. If you weren't figuring it out, he. Wants to pee on you or he wants to be peed on. Seeing a woman piss is a huge turn on for me. I would also love to give a golden shower to a woman. So doesn't matter where, it doesn't matter how this goes, he's into it. Hey, piss on you, you piss on him. Doesn't matter. I don't understand. If I was there, if I was a single man, I would piss on someone, but I would not want to be with him just to know what it was like. I don't think it would be. It wouldn't.

1:05:59 Turn me on at all? No, I'm just saying I'm good. She's nasty. I just peed on her to see if I could. She left me so. It might take me a second to be able to get the piss out, you know what I mean? Like you'd be sitting there like you'd be nervous. Yeah, yeah, I'd be very nervous. I'm not saying. I'm too many people. In the restroom, I can't even pee. I'm like, all right, man, there's too many people here. I'm not. Saying I'm a nervous peer, but if somebody's literally staring at my penis while I'm trying, you're like, because normally you have the partitions in between the urine. But but if she's begging for it like she's on the cross, like can you pee? Now I work with years ago work with a guy and I always thought he was just trying to be sick and joking, but he he liked to be pissed on. And I met this this lady and she said, yeah, he gave me tickets and I come over and I had to pee on him. He laid in the bathtub.

1:06:43 I'm like oh was this a *? Wars character by chance? This is. That Yoda guy, he's dead now. I'm hope he's burning in hell. He's AI. Really hope he is too. Yeah, that's what I thought he meant. He liked to get pissed on. I don't understand that well. Jimmy, Jimmy this and this the same guy that, and correct me if I'm wrong, used to just get on Greyhound buses for no fucking reason. Weird. That is weird. He was the guy that I said that. He said I'll he never met my daughter. He's like, I'll see you at a bus stop. I said. I'll put a bullet in your fucking school. Oh, I remember you talking about this before. He's a piece of shit. Anyway. I hope hell is enjoying him right now. Devil's peeing on him right now. Hold. On we'll do it. We'll do.

1:07:27 It. This one, this one piss. The title for this one is just hookups 27 year old man. So I'm in an open relationship but I'm looking for a mean blowjob because my girlfriend can't blow me. Hit me up I'm new and would love to play with some new people. Couple What's a? Mean blowjob? Just wondering. Just just somebody who can deep like a champion. I guess I'm just wondering why can't your girlfriend? Yeah. Gag reflex or your Dick smells, or what's happening right now. Maybe. Maybe she's just not good at it. Maybe. That's what I'm saying. Like she tries and it's just not good.

1:08:08 Look, I'll I'll say this right now, not all women are and it's OK. But the thing, too was like, they're always good. Like, I mean, it's like, yeah. Because like, like sometimes you're just having like, hey, good for you for trying. You can't even college try. Yeah, exactly. Like, hey, I got head like as a guy, you're like, oh, she's she's sucked my Dick. That's crazy. It's like eating pizza or I got I got some pizza, I got whatever. It's good shit. No matter what, it's still going to be good. There's not. I mean, there's bad pizza, but it's still kind of good, is what I'm saying. Kind of, yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, there's, there's bad head, but it's still kind of good because it's, you know, it's head. And you appreciate the effort. I get it. Just like I'm sure like I, I don't know, because nobody's, nobody's actually sat me down and told me I don't know how I am at eating pussy.

1:08:53 I have no earthly idea. I like to assume that I'm good, but they might just be going along with it. Be like, you know what he's trying. Yeah. If this were, if this, if this were a picture, we'd put it on the fridge just because he did it. But if she's so good at sucking Dick, you're like, how many Dicks have you had? Yeah, you need to start. Yeah. I remember it having this that conversation in my head because when I was I was like my girlfriend hate it was probably hates when I talk about why sex my past sex life. But when I was 24 I was I was dating a 19 year old for like 4 months and she was fantastic and I thought how many how You are 19 you should not have any experience doing this.

1:09:34 This is weird. It could just be that she's, you know, watched a lot of porn too. It's still, it's still, it's still weirded me out. We didn't. We lasted like not very long. I've definitely had those thoughts in my head before. Natural and then you're down there eating pussy and you're like, I didn't do an alphabet 86 that's what. They tell you. I don't know if that's true or not. I don't know, but I'm like damn, how long are they going to? I've done the alphabet 17 times already. What? The fuck? Cream my face. Let's get this over with. I'm cutting the bottom of my tongue all. Right female to man here for anything or breeding.

1:10:20 Hey there, looking for a woman to breastfeed from. Can be but doesn't have to be sexual and I can respect you either way or to be bred into taboo stuff. DM me so. What does it mean to be bred? I think it's like a like I'm going to get you pregnant fantasy, but like not getting oh wait, there ain't. Nothing about that hot. Or maybe or the person that's getting fucked like this is a female to a man. So who's who's getting bred here? I don't know. Oh wait, so it's trans person, is that what is that? Yeah, but it's important.

1:11:01 It's important to understand the the from part like what was what was this person before? So we can see where they are now. But you just want to breast they want. To be they want to be bred. I don't it's or to be bred looking for a woman to be to breastfeed from or to be bred. So I think the woman that they're looking for would be bred. I'm so confused, is this a real woman or or a transformer? Yes, that the second one. So the person is was a woman is now a man, but also want is also looking for. A woman to breastfeed from. OK, OK.

1:11:43 OK, All right. I guess I'm it's. Confusing, I know, I know, it's a confusing time. Y'all some nasty motherfuckers on that. You get the fucking. Gross. You know the Hell's wrong with. You. Well, here's one more Dirty Girl. Yeah, this is Reno. Dirty Girl wanted. This is a 49 year old female. Hi ladies, I'm looking for a proper dirty slut to play with my male partner while I watch. I can participate or not. The dynamic can be flexible, we both can be dominant or submissive depending on the vibe. Can be fairly vanilla or we can get the ropes out, whatever you're into.

1:12:23 I'm just itching to see him with another girl. Femme trans girls welcome to hoping to find a fabulous fucker for fun games. We'll be in Reno next week. Does he know he's? Got. But he does he know that there could be a trans? It's fine. You can't make those blanket statements without him knowing. I don't know, man. Some people have those those sort of relationships, I guess. Well, I. Mean I'm I'm assuming he has to know that she would put that there because you can't just bring home a girl and then she whips out a Dick like babe, we did not decide that it's like no, you got to you have you have to communicate when it comes to surprise penises. Like her pussy looks fake. But does it feel real?

1:13:07 I don't know. I. Don't know. I don't. Want to know? I don't want to know at all, no. I just want a real, organic, natural vagina. That's all I want, life. That's it, That's it. Everybody else can do the nasty stuff. I just don't know. I just want a real pussy. Just want to be nasty stuff with my wife. I don't want to. That's like a female, a woman. Yeah, A. Real woman, but people can do what they want. I'm not judging a little bit. I'm kind of her. Clit's getting hard. Oh shit. All right, Reno, you a bunch of freaks. That's Craigslist for this week. Jesus, that was pretty good. Damn, I didn't know Reno was like that. Everywhere's like that, you just got to turn out the lights. I. Don't try to know people's lives like that.

1:13:47 That's nasty. Hey, in the words of Houdini, the freaks come out at night. They sure do, and there's a lot of freaks in Reno Bay. If you ever like. Like Ian said, if there's any city you want us to want Ian to do the Craigslist from, put it right there in the comments and we'll get to it. All right. So by the way, just a quick reminder, you can subscribe for videos on Spotify or a little less than what it's on what's on Patreon, but you're not getting anything but the video. Also, there is our shirt of the month on sale right now at not tds.com in the damn store. So get on over there and make sure you say congratulations to Stroke, who is now officially married. I don't even think I said congratulations to you. So congratulations. Don't worry, I was. Just a bitching. It's still me absorbing it. It's still weird.

1:14:28 You know what I mean? Like, it's still you don't like Mikey when you first put on your ring. It's weird, right? It was weird, yeah. Like you're getting used to this ring and I have a nice ring, but it's just, well. That's what I'm saying. This is your third ring. How's it weird at this point? Because I haven't wore one since 2017. Eighteen, 1718. Jimmy Fair. So that pitch was crazy. Oh my God, being crazy. Yeah. But that one, I didn't know the first one, so I can't say I do, I do. The second one I knew a little bit well. That's that's the the the the first one is you know, his his daughters mom, so he's not going to say that much was crazy. I. Don't feel like this one is going to kill me though. She's nice and does good stuff for me and tasting fun I know I like.

1:15:11 I like her. I think she's super sweet. I, I she's got great ideas. She's funny. I think she's great. I think she's perfect. She doesn't scare me and she's a former Army vet and I know. So she can kill you, but she won't. She can kill me but I don't think she will. She just our only biggest fight is spending money. You or her? Her he doesn't spend money. That's true. I'm stingy and she's talking. Stroke is frugal as a motherfucker. He is, yeah. She's like Mikey, Mikey Target, you know, like Mikey and Target. They just I tell her all the time, don't go to. Target. But what's weird is like he like he he he he he. He'll sit home for for days and not spend a cent but then want to go stupid but do stupid shit like bingo and drag all of us to it. Now we all got to spend money.

1:15:58 You're never letting that go. Never. That's the worst bingo experience ever. That's my only bingo experience. Halpi bingo. I'm all about burn chip bingo. Whatever I'm in, we'll do that. Chicken chip Bingo, Yeah. Bingo, whatever the fuck we'll get that planned out. That'll be a that'll be an event. Maybe this year, not that damn show. But anyway, it makes you guys are following us in in supporting the show and subscribing and doing all the things and until next time we will see you on Thursday. Bye. Hey, this was really fun. We hope you liked it too. You know, we've had a lot. Of laughs tonight. Seems like we've just begun. When? Suddenly we're through. But I'll tell you what's not funny. Bye. Goodbye, good friends, goodbye. Kevin Strippers.

1:16:39 Because now it's time to go. Strippers are people too, naked people who may be willing to pleasure you for a price you negotiate later, behind the curtain in the VIP room. We'll see you very soon. Shy, just no need to kill him. Very. Soon I know because most. Of them are already dead inside. Goodbye. Goodbye.